This is all about one woman’s journey through infertility, adoption, seeking enlightenment and peace of mind.
The stats: married at 38, tried sex cause I heard that nasty rumour about getting pregnant that way, but no dice. After a year, jumped into the medical breach with lots of hope and excitement. 3 IUI’s, 2 laps, 4 IVFS, 2 fresh, 2 frozen, lots of eggs but no implantation in rocky fibroidy soil. Surgery on fibroids could have resulted in me not having a uterus, so not being urged in that direction, I elected to keep trying. Yes, I did acupuncture, chinese herbal medicine, LOTS of daimoku, naturopathic diets – even RELAXING. No two lines for me.
Enter massive weight gain, depression, loss of faith and a yearning that I didn’t even know was possible. Yeah, that includes moving on to adoption. Another option I thought was going to work out quickly. Haha. Enter the first sentence of this paragraph. And just when I thought the end of the road was near…. well, we’ll see…..
We arrived home with our adopted son right before my self imposed deadline for waiting. Can’t say I really enjoyed the whole adoption process but it did give me what I want – a child to parent. Now the journey is about healing, learning to be a mother and navigate open adoption. And just for the record, I’m happy.
July 19, 2009 at 7:42 PM
I’ve been reading your story for a long time now and would love a password. My husband and I just decided to move onto adoption after 3 failed IUIs and 5 failed IVFs.
July 20, 2009 at 6:15 PM
I have been reading your story for a while too and would love to read your pw protected posts. Can you e-mail me the password: kelly at digitalpembroke dot com? Thanks.
July 21, 2009 at 4:01 PM
Anybody who’s had 3 failed IUI’s and 5 failed IVFs is alright in my book! Come on in!
August 4, 2009 at 2:37 PM
I have been reading you rblog forever, I even have you on my blog roll. May I have the password please?
August 5, 2009 at 1:29 PM
oh my email is lilmarcosmom@gmail.com
August 18, 2009 at 10:34 PM
I haven’t read your protected blog entry “If had known then, what I know now…” but I don’t think I have to to understand. As I offered before, you’re not alone. I applaud your honesty and willingness to share your story. If possible, I would like to read it.
Email is aanagnostou226@gmail.com. Thanks.
August 22, 2009 at 7:30 PM
You have been through a lot… I admire your strength! Wishing you good luck with the adoption process!
~ICLW
March 5, 2010 at 2:16 PM
I’d love to read your password protected posts if you will permit me to. I’d also like to share the link to my adoption blog.
http://ammabyadoption.wordpress.com
April 10, 2010 at 5:08 PM
I’ve just found your blog and I’m so happy you’re a parent now! I agree with you that I would not want to go through the adoption process ever again – so stressful. But you are a family now and that’s the main thing when it’s all said and done. Congratulations!
June 17, 2010 at 3:42 AM
Hi,
You are on my blogroll… we are kindred spirits. I married late but was already barren and unable to conceive. We have toddler twin sons via traditional surrogacy. I’ve written many truly soul-baring posts that I have “unpublished”. Heart rending and painful. I’d love the password for your entries that are probably much of the same.
Hugs from one older mama to another!
December 26, 2010 at 9:39 PM
I’m so glad you have a child! That’s what it’s all about!
~Jem (ICLW #5)
http://ambivalentwomb.blogspot.com/
January 25, 2011 at 8:56 PM
Hi:
I popped over here on the recommendation of PaleMother. I have an almost 4 yr old son through IVF/PGD but another 5 rounds of IVF + 1 DE cycle did not produce a sibling. We are hoping to domestically adopt a newborn.
I had fibroids removed twice (once after a radiologist told us to use my eggs and hire a surrogate. A-hole).
I live in So CA and will be 45 (!) in May.
I look forward to reading more…
January 26, 2011 at 8:42 AM
You are welcome indeed! And if you need an expensive lawyer, just let me know!
July 22, 2011 at 6:21 AM
I would love to read your protected post.
I have one daughter through IVF after five years of infertility.
December 8, 2011 at 3:10 PM
Wow. I started reading you blog last night. I ended up calling in a “work-from-home” day cause I was still reading.
So many of your thoughts resonant with me, although my adoption journey began only 2 months ago, I wonder how I will manage to wait the three year wait our agency gave us. We are in the province east of BC, going through a private agency after years and years of IVF/IUI/Chinese herbs/acupuncture etc etc. I also made the mistake of thinking adoption would be the end of the waiting. Wow, I hate being this wrong.
Point being, last week I could barely get my butt out of bed. And your blog has given me hope and some laughter. Thank you