Old friends

I went to my old friend’s for dinner.  We all used to hang out and go camping when we single and happening. DH was a little relieved he was out of town, he really started to dislike the hubby.   Nothing big happened, I think when he finally stopped smoking weed with him, he began to see that he was too annoying to spend that much time with.  Funny how that happens.

I pull up – late, of course, and this other car pulls up behind me.  A woman gets out and says “Oh, are you here for the same birthday party?” Then my friend appears in her doorway.  (Still thin as a rail after two kids by the way.  Damn genetics).  Great, a fact she neglected to mention to me that it’s her second child’s birthday.  Why do people do that?  She kept saying it was no big deal, since the little girl had gotten a party already, but I felt a little annoyed.   When she was born, I’ m pretty sure I didn’t send so much as  a card.  Not a deliberate act, but we never saw each other anyway.  Luckily, I had dragged both baby and dog over to the liquor store and bought a decent bottle of wine to give to them.  I generally don’t go to anyone’s place empty handed, anyway.  Something my mother taught me. And I was even classy enough to dress it in a nice Asian ornamental wine bag.

Anyway, it was a pretty low key affair anyway, we all had kids to manage and feed at the same time.  Nothing like a delicious meal I didn’t have to cook to take the edge off.   Anyways, the husband seems to have mellowed with parenthood.

They had conceived right after my first big fat IVF negative.  There was always a little bitter pill with that because they are a biracial couple as well, and seeing their first born was always like seeing how our kids could have looked like.  And DH and the hubby were always engaged in that stupid one-upmanship things that guys seem to do.  You gotta new truck, I gotta new truck, you gotta new tent, we gotta a new tent.  Hey, you guys are trying to get pregnant?  Well, lookee here, we actually made a mocha baby!

Their other friend started to ask about birth details, you know women, they want all the gory details, of course.   Did you know you were having a boy, etc, that sort of innocent thing.  I don’t know her, and I didn’t want to talk about adoption all flipping night, so I just changed the subject.  I suppose they will end up telling her anyway.

I suppose at some point, we should reciprocate dinner, but that’s always a little tricky with young kids.   Back in the day, all those set of guys (and yes, me, on occasion) would spend many summer nights smoking and drinking and eating good food, and talking.  If you think that changes just cause people have kids, you can think again.  They just go to the garage.

On the plus side, I was always fond of his wife and he always had a generous spirit.  They called when they heard Sampson died.  I adored seeing their dog, now old, the last of the old dogs alive.  I had tears in my eyes when I saw him.  He was with us, when DH proposed to me.  Part pit and part licking machine, we had loved him too.

I guess we’re all mellowing with age, and with parenthood.


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