I woke up in a pissy mood because, well… it was pissy outside. I hate getting wet, really hate it. Picked the wrong city to live in, didn’t I? Anyway, other than bitching about the crappy weather we had in June, we’re doing okay. I had a busy day doing errands and visiting mum. DH is away for a few days on business, so we’re on our own for a bit.
Spent the weekend on the island visiting the in-laws. I wasn’t in the best of moods, thanks to Aunt Flo, but my MIL is awesome and she tried to cheer me up by taking me shopping for clothes. Probably not the best idea. Yep, it’s Weight Watchers time again. I will wait til we get back from T.O. Perhaps running around in the heat will give me motivation. I’m back to feeling uncomfortable again and though the official line is that I’m at medium risk for diabetes so I should watch my weight, the unofficial truth is that life for me at 20 lbs overweight is annoying, infuriating and uncomfortable.
Annoying cause I have a hard time finding clothes that fit. It leaves with a grand total of 2 stores in my neighbourhood (and I live in a downtown shopping area) that might carry my size and god forbid I don’t buy it cause when it goes on sale, my size is going to be gone and I’m faced with a sea of single digit sizes. I could go into the major department stores, but I have neither the time nor the stamina to sort through row after row of racks of clothing, haul a ton of stuff to a waiting room on the other side of the floor only to find out that nothing fits right. Infuriating because I did it to myself for all sorts of logical emotional eating reasons that made perfect sense at that time. Also infuriating is that I am not surprised I’m back at this point.
I’m uncomfortable in my skin and I’m umcomfortable with addressing the reasons why I am. Geneen Roth’s Woman, Food and God stirred up a lot in me, most of which is anger – and that’s the most uncomfortable feeling of all.