DH was in a pout yesterday because I had the audacity to schedule my mum for a hair appt on “his” Friday.  Which meant I needed the car.  (We had another car, but gave it away since it was 16 years old and we rarely used it.)  He actually started to pout.  I wanted him to mind the baby while I dealt with her.  He wanted to go meet his friend (read pot smoking friend) and his dog at this park about a 20 minute drive from here.  I asked if he could go later after I picked my mum up.  Honestly, it was like dealing with a teenager.  I had told him the day before that I was going to do that.  So I’m feeding the baby lunch and he’s pouting in the office.  I go to him and tell him I’ll take a taxi, but no, I “can’t take a baby in a taxi”.  I’ll take the carseat.  No, he doesn’t want his “family” running around in a taxi.  I tell him to come up with another alternative.  If I had known this was going to ruin his day, I would not have set it up this way, I fully expected him to be okay with it.  Fuck, he can stay out all night if he wants.

Then he starts ranting.  I strangely stay calm.  But that’s what you do when you deal with a teenager, right?  Now, it’s the “you always do this, you seem to think working all day is like a treat, I take care of the baby all week when I come home from work…..” speech.  I don’t remind him that I am actually present the whole time, get up in the middle of the night and have put him to bed myself at least twice, bathed him twice, that it’s been a short week and he hasn’t even taken him out in the afternoon with the dog.  I say nothing because he’s being whiny and he knows it.   I know he doesn’t want to ask his friend to come and pick him up for their play date.

I go back to feeding the baby and all of a sudden his friend texts him and says he can borrow his truck to get home if he needs it.   I start to call a friend who lives at least 20 minutes from here to come and stay with the kid, but…. I agree to drive him and the dog to this park.  As he’s driving to this park, I tell him he’s throwing a hissy fit and pouting and he can’t even object well, because he knows he is.  I’m thinking, this is what happens when he decides he want to get stoned with his buddy.  He gets petulant.  I drop him off and  go get mum and take her to the hairdresser.  The last time I did this he was out of town and so I had to bring the kid and I swore I wouldn’t do it again, but here I was.  I did this to myself.  I try to get mum ready (and she’s not getting it that day, folks, I have to find socks (mismatched), put them on her with her holding onto the kid on the bed, put on her shoes, which she then proceeds to take off again, finally get everyone buckled back in the car.  Drive through Friday afternoon traffic to the hairdresser (we’re late), then ask the hairdresser to come to the car to get her for me so I don’t have to unbuckle the kid for a 2 minute outing.  Then since I only have an hour or so, I take the kid to Costco to pick up something for a friend, grab a hot dog (cause now I only have $2 left on me and I haven’t eaten in hours) and go home.  I go home because I realize I haven’t brought his diaper bag with me.  I eat the hot dog, get mustard on my nice sweater, pick up my cell phone and some cash,  change his diaper, then leave again to pick up mother.  The hairdresser kindly brings her to the car, I pay her and then hubby texts me to let me know when I’m done and could I leave a space in the carpark for another vehicle or maybe come get him?  I unbuckle the kid, put him in Ergo, drop mum off from the elevator (it opens, I tell her to go to dining room for dinner cause if I take her, then everyone will want to see the kid and I have to wait for a staff person to un-busy themselves to key open the elevator again).

Here is where I make the mistake.  I stupidly graciously offer to come pick him up because if I go home to feed the kid, I am not going back out to get him that’s for sure.  I should have let him take his friend’s truck.  But I’m thinking, I’m going to have to follow him the next day  with our truck anyway, so what’s the point? There will go my sleep in time.  I stupidly head back out into Friday afternoon traffic.  Big, big mistake.  The kid starts whinging.  Downtown is a bunch of one way streets, so you know, even going home is going to be a hassle.  I call him (making an illegal phone call even though the car is stuck in traffic) and tell him can he still get a ride home, cause the kid is hungry and crying now.  Chewing on my Starbucks coffee sleeve is no longer working for him.  He says no, everyone has left the park, so it’s just him and the dog.  I hang up and luckily the kid falls asleep and I pick him up and tell him we’re going home, no stops. I send him for takeout.  A nice expensive Malaysian black cod for me thanks.  I feed the kid, bathe him and put him to bed. Did I tell you my back is killing me? And my right eye is red from me rubbing it with a scratched contact lens? And I went to bed with a green pill, an iron pill and a new Stephen King book at 10pm?  Oh, yes, oblivion.  Life is sweet.

Cause you know, hubby’s had a stressful week.  I can’t wait til he goes to NY next week.  Can’t wait.


4 thoughts on “TGIF

  1. Sometimes, you just want to smack them.

    Hope he wises up in NY and comes home with sumptuous presents for you and an appropriately adjusted attitude.

    Love you – and wish I was handy to be your in-a-pinch childcare.

  2. Sometimes it takes everything you’ve got to not throw a heavy, sharp object straight at their head.

    I swear they really are from another planet.

    There is a reason women usually outlive men….we have earned the peace and quiet.

    (and they say WOMEN are drama queens-sheesh!)

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