*I wrote this last night, but went to bed before I finished it.
I should be sleeping but I just have to make this quick post. I am watching Away We Go with John Krasinski and Maya Randolph and I’m probably going to bed right after I write this, so don’t ask me about the ending. Anyways, it’s the story of this couple who are pregnant and they go visiting their friends and family with kids to find out how they can be good parents or something like that. Anyways, they go visit people in Montreal and their friends have 4 adopted kids and everything looks so happy. Maya Randolph tells the wife that her getting pregnant was a happy accident. The wife asks Maya Randolph who is 6 months pregnant how things are going with her pregnancy. She then downs her drink and says half heartedly that she’s happy for her. Then the husband takes them to a strip bar (cause apparently that’s what Montrealers do for fun) and they are stunned to find his wife up there for amateur night. They thought she was in the bathroom. And he sits there riveted while she does a slow, sad dance around the pole (with her clothes on) and tells John Krasinski that she had another miscarriage. Her 5th miscarriage. He goes on to say that they were selfish and waited til their 30s to have children only to find it difficult; that they watched their babies grow and then fade away; that 14 year olds can have babies without barely trying; and that they didn’t know whether to name or bury their dead babies. The wife finishes her sad dance, and goes to cuddle in her husband’s arms.
So. I thought it was incredibly sad for a couple of reasons. I really liked the husband’s monologue about the pain of not being able to have children, the pain of losing your babies. I could really feel the wife’s grief/indifference in face of a pregnant belly. I could even understand that adoption didn’t solve the problem of infertility and loss. But I kinda felt like they were saying that you can adopt all the kids you want, you’re still going to want to keep trying to have your own child and this women endured 5 miscarriages.
Has anyone seen the movie? What do you think? I know there are women who proceed with adoption plans and IVF at the same time. Do they want to just have more than one kid or is it more like hedging your bets kind of thing? Would I have done the same thing had it been an option? Not sure.
Ah, it’s a boring saga but it’s mine. I have something slightly less boring for you later…..
I had DH wake up the Precious at about 5:45 and asked him to change him into a cotton sleeper, then feed him dinner and then put him back to bed…. and one hour later, he went right back to sleep with no playtime. And then he woke up at 4:10am. However, it’s DH turn to get up now that it’s the weekend. He gave him a big bottle of milk and had him back to sleep in 15 min. And of course back up this morning around 7:30am.
So from what I’ve been reading, this is a fairly typical thing in his age range and there is no one thing that will magically fix it. So we will try the early to bed thing again tonight. Now he had a big dinner right before going to bed – meaning he eats about a jar and a half of baby food, then pureed fruit. Then he gets a six ounce bottle. I don’t think I can get him to eat any more food than he already does. He lets me know when he’s had enough (he’s got the arm block down to a science). He gets solids 3 – 5 times a day and milk (4 bottles throughout the day). If we’re out and about, he gets Mum Mum rice crackers til we get home.
So, I guess this is the part where I learn to roll with things. However, all your suggestions are duly noted and I will probably try them alllllllllll!
Thanks for the input, we’re going to try to put him to bed a bit earlier. As a matter of fact, I’ll try throwing everything at the wall and seeing what sticks. He had an early morning meltdown, so I put him down for a nap. A tiny bit of protesting, but my timing was good. Then this afternoon, I fed him lunch, did some emails, took a shower, then tried to get out the door to see mother. I suspected he was a bit sleepy from lunch, but it was a spectacular day and I wanted to get out. We headed out, he fell asleep for about 15 minutes or so in his stroller, then he woke up. We took mum out for a stroll then headed to Starbucks for our customary outing, then took mum back. It’s now about 3:30. I stop at an Indian restaurant to pick up some dinner because I’m pretty darn sure this is going to be husband’s first question when I see him later. That’s when he started to wind up and act whiney and I pulled out every trick in the book while we waited for the takeout to be ready. 10 minutes later, we’re home, I feed him a bottle (thinking he had a huge lunch and can’t be that hungry after the crackers I gave him later) and put him down. He cries for 45 minutes straight. I try to ignore it. Last time, I just went in and rocked him a bit and he fell asleep so I try that. Nope. So he cries some more. Finally I give up, go in and wipe the snot from his face, his t-shirt is SOAKED from tears, and I give him another small bottle. I cry a few tears as he gives me THAT look, you know, the one that says WHERE WERE YOU? I JUST WANTED A BIT MORE. And then he falls asleep.
So I’ll let him have a short nap, feed him dinner and put him back to bed – that’s the plan anyway.
Now I’m going to have a little drink and forgive myself for not being perfect.