Raining

The in-laws have come and gone and as usual, I am expected to fit my life around others. I’ll spare you the long rant where the same courtesy was not extended to me.   I still had some transcribing work to do but of course, hubby insisted I sit and socialize.  I really do enjoy my in-laws, but sometimes I wish I could just check into a spa and not come out for two days.  We did enjoy a night out, dinner and a movie, but of course, DH rushes back home the instant the movie is over.  I find myself irritated and brooding.  I was reading Eden’s blog and came across this line:

You are not less than anybody else. You are not less than anybody else.

It was in her post How to Live and so I highly recommend reading it.    Sometimes the negative voices in my head come back to haunt me in the wee hours and I look for encouragement wherever I can.  And because I had a couple of religiously motivated people show up at my door this morning so that I could declare I was a Buddhist I shall also offer this (the whole article can be find here):

“Cherry, plum, peach and damson blossoms all have their own qualities, and they manifest the three properties of the life of the Buddha without changing their character”.  Simply put, each one of us contributes our own unique qualities through the role we play in society. The Daishonin uses the example of the cherry, plum, peach and damson flowers to make his point. The cherry flower is renowned for its beauty; many people enjoy seeing the cherry blossoms in the spring. The plum blooms in late winter–while other flowers usually bloom in the spring–and it, too, is known for its beauty. According to an old Chinese tradition, peaches are said to bring longevity and ward off evil. The damson flower’s appearance is different from the others, but it is associated with assiduousness and perseverance.

Attaining enlightenment does not require us to become anything other than a human being; it is recognizing our own true value and worth exactly as we are. By being true to ourselves, we can become happy. Only we know what it is that makes us happy and only we know when we are making efforts to make ourselves happy. Comparing ourselves with others only leads to a sense of inferiority or superiority. By focusing on surpassing our own limitations—without focusing on what others are doing—we will find it much easier to grow. No matter how much we try to become like someone else, we can only be ourselves.

At a time of insecurity and change (and a whole lotta rain), I’m struggling to rest easy in the knowledge that I am enough.

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2 thoughts on “Raining

  1. I am right there with you struggling. Spitting snow here though rather than rain.

    Too bad we can’t run off to a spa for a few days…laugh ourselves silly, feel pretty and then come home. I am also someone expected to fit around others — and then I ask myself if I am too willing to bend — I haven’t answered that one yet…

    Changing spaces is monumental though…things will settle in. You will.

    Love and virtual chocolate (because doesn’t that always help)
    XO

    Pam

  2. I hear ya. I keep trying to achieve something, I’m just not sure what. I know that I just need to appreciate where I am and how lucky we are to have a super duper koo koo toddler who will never be this age again.

    Sidenote: A wise and compassionate person once said to me when I was melting down: They are your feelings and you are entitled to all of them.

    I love that.

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