My back has been giving me grief and of course, my chiropractor was on vacation. So it got worse and I found myself back in his office again yesterday. Of course, the Precious did his usual no, no, no routine and as because he was tired, I mustered patience and persistence and we finally got there, late, but the dejavu moment was not lost on me. How many times have I laid on that table with the kid in the corner and me grimacing and moaning through the acupressure to release my tight muscles. Sometimes I wonder if it’s the daily routine of mundane life that has brought me to my knees.
A couple days ago, the Precious was merrily skipping down the pavement with the dog’s chuckit stick (it’s this thing that catapults a ball) and he tripped and banged his head on the sidewalk. It sounded like a watermelon hitting the ground. I was only 3 feet behind him and as I gathered him up in my arms and inspected the pearly red blood (so bright) flowing from cuts on his head, a calm, coiled tension entered my body. I calmed his cries, carried him up the front stairs of the house and placed him on the bench. I gathered the dog who had become stuck because of a trailing extendaleash (I hate those things but that morning I couldn’t locate her usual lead) and went back to inspecting him. Some cuts on his knees, a small piece of skin missing on his forehead, but otherwise okay. I took him inside, cleaned his head with a cool cloth and called 811, the nursing line. As I was put on hold, I was already picturing myself on the way to my doctor’s. My little champ assisted me bravely by holding a cold cloth to his head and then the gauze. After talking to the nurse, it was decided that as long as he didn’t display any serious symptoms, then a doctor visit was not needed. Then I called my husband to fill him in. I had a first aid kit and I was shaking the cold compress – which did not get cold at all. I cursed J&J and then when the kid was all bandaged up and quiet, I called them to give them a piece of my mind. They promptly apologized and courteously promised me a $20 cheque was in the mail. I just wanted to yell at somebody.
The Precious was fine, quite impressed with the big bandage I put on his head, the penguin bandaids on his knees and the popsicle he received for his troubles. Apparently a cool bandaid and a Popsicle made it all better. An hour later we went to the local school field for a picnic. He was running and laughing and chasing the ball I was throwing for the dog. I looked at this kid with amazement. He was ours? How lucky we were! I watched him run after two swallows that had come out to play. They swooped great circles around him. Tears sprang to my eyes. It was like I was watching a miracle. He just ran around in the grass laughing and giggling. I was so relieved and so freaking happy that he was okay. Maybe I should have had a popsicle too.
So on one hand, I feel worn out and would love to ship him off to his grandparents for a week. My nerves get frayed with all constant 12 hour days of toddler demands and needs on top of cooking, cleaning up, laundry, dog duty, transcribing all night long and when I get an hour to myself I just want to disappear into a vaccum, and then the other hand, I feel so grateful to be a mother to this kid. And lately, I feel like that every freaking day. So weird.