Microblog Mondays – TMI

Microblog_MondaysI missed last week’s Microblog Mondays (which in my case, usually is a macroblog) due to Thanksgiving weekend.  The Canadian Thanksgiving is not the usual sentimental, drive a million miles to get to kind of holiday but it is a long weekend and if you’re of a certain age, then you have family over and have a big meal.  My husband’s brother is back from England (after a long and weary tale of alcoholic relapse, divorce and unemployment) and living with his parents while he rebuilds his life.  His recently acquired job let him take some time off for Thanksgiving so he was able to come over and join us.  That was really nice to see after all the prayers and concern over him.  I missed my side of the family who didn’t even think to call me, thanks a lot, even though I called them.  I’m getting more sentimental by the second, aren’t I?  Boo said he was thankful for his family which warmed my heart and of course my thoughts flew to his birthmother.  Boo was born on the American thanksgiving weekend.  I have learned over the years not to go too crazy with from scratch recipes with DH’s family as they are English and frankly like the same old boring holiday meals with very little variation.  A few years ago I did a brined turkey for Christmas and that about made my MIL’s head spin for days.  We had ham, one of those ridiculously expensive turkey roasts  (all meat, no wasted leftovers), vegetables, boxed stuffing, potatoes (Buddha forbid we don’t have potatoes), green beans and carrots (boiled of course, but you know I had to pan fry them with butter and garlic) and cause I can’t stand the same old stuff, I made a butternut squash au gratin and a pumpkin cheesecake. I had thoughts about making an apple pie from scratch but bought one for $3.99 instead.  I also drank a lot of Apothic Red.  I know what you’re thinking – it’s cheap, but I live in Canada where the tax the heck out of booze, so it’s over twice the American price, so it still makes me bourgie.

I had a week full of transcribing and auditions.  I did book a small gig.  One liner. It does get to me sometimes to go for all these great auditions and interesting parts and the only thing I book is a one liner.  Sigh.  I can’t say I was thrilled about it because it wasn’t even the part I had the callback for, but I had my bitch session and I’m over it.  It’s a cheque and we need it. I will smile and have fun and not complain about my shitty trailer.

Now for the good stuff, my colonoscopy.  I always love a good adventure. The prep was dreadful, dreadful, dreadful!!!  No food, only clear liquids allowed.  I broke down and bought a package of Jello cause I was desperate to consume something approaching texture.  I hate jello.  I was in bed most of the fasting day, cause really the last thing I wanted to do was go for a brisk walk in the woods with the dog and work up an appetite for more jello.  In the evening,  I drank 1 litre of stuff that tastes sort of like metamucil-thick, clear,  sprite tasting gatorade.  1 cup every 10 minutes. Waited another hour and proceeded with the next litre.  I did make it through the whole day without wanting to kill anyone.  The next morning I had to finish off the last 2 litres in 1 hour.   4 litres people! That’s like one of those big vinegar jugs. That made me want to kill someone.  But I was too busy trying not to soil myself before making the 5ft to the bathroom. Two words.  Niagara Falls.  Hubby dropped me off at this hospital I didn’t even know existed and they whisked me up to a quad room and gave me a typical gown to put on and a plastic bag to stuff my clothes in.  I chatted with a lady there who had already done her procedure and she assured me it was a breeze.  If there’s one thing Canadian women do well is bond over medical tests.  I also let her use my phone to text her son who was late picking her up.  There was a man there waiting for his wife to pick him up and I heard him tell the nurse that he was holding his gas in even though he was supposed to be letting it out.  That was kinda funny.   I read a little and then was whisked away to get it done.  They gave me something to relax me and I assumed I’d drift off.  Instead I chatted all the way through my colonoscopy.  I think I was done in about 10 minutes.  I could see my clean as a whistle colon on a flat screen TV in front of me.  Cool.  And happy to report, no ominous tumours or polyps!  And according to the post procedure report, no hemorrhoids which is a little confusing because I’m sure the doctor said I had a couple of little ones (which I thought would explain my leaky bum). The inlaws had picked the kid up from school but I was home not long after feeling just fine and dandy.  I’m not sure why they made someone pick you up, I could have driven myself but that’s standard when they use sedatives/pain killers.

No, I did not lose any weight. And my bum is still itchy. Damn!


10 thoughts on “Microblog Mondays – TMI

  1. Glad to hear you had a nice holiday and that your colonoscopy didn’t reveal any concerns. (Yes, the prep for the colonoscopy is brutal.)

  2. Glad to hear that it went fine and you got a clean bill of health. But 4 liters! I can barely get down a liter of water a day. I don’t know how I’ll drink 4 liters of sludge. Shudder.

    Happy late Thanksgiving, and congratulations on the one-liner.

  3. Glad you’re done with the procedure as well. I’ll be doing it as well, sometime in the relatively near future (need to get my hysterectomy out of the way first). Cool that you got to watch on the flat screen. 🙂

  4. I read this when I was away last week, so apologies for the late response. Don’t have much to say other than echoing the others to be glad that the results were good. I still haven’t arranged mine, but will do so soon.

  5. Oh my gosh you were AWAKE for your colonoscopy??? That must have been surreal, like a real trip down a rabbit hole. (Sorry, that was a gross comparison.) I’m glad it all went well and that is behind you (har har). Butternut squash au gratin sounds AMAZING.

  6. Glad all went well! It’s funny how the prep & even the procedure vary from clinic to clinic. Dh had his first colonoscopy at a different place than when he did his second (& my first), and the prep was different (although both places knocked us out for the actual procedure). I am told it’s much better than it was years ago — but I swear, I still hope I never see another bottle of Gatorade in my life. :p Nasty stuff!

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