Microblog Mondays – Some things just don’t go away

Microblog_MondaysI was catching up with a friend Saturday night and relating the sister drama that unfolded after my mother’s death.  I told her that I wanted to go to Toronto in the spring or summer and try to reconnect with my eldest sister.  She asked me why I would even bother considering what happened and related some of her family drama.  Considering that my eldest sister and I have only been alone together (during a car ride about a decade ago), chances of us having a private conversation are slim to none.  I am not so interested in changing her as much as I am about getting clear with her.  I think I understand the source of her unhappiness but am not clear as to what role I personally play in it, if it all.  When someone yells at you and hangs up on you, not once, but twice and then acts as if everything is just peachy, that’s just weird.  She doesn’t want to be understood, she just wants to be obeyed.

Of course, I haven’t heard boo from her since the funeral.  Typical.  And I haven’t called her either, though I did get a  Merry Christmas text from one of her daughters.  I don’t get her and her family at all.   I really hate it when people throw out religious vernacular when it suits them and then behave in a hypocritical manner.  And getting a hold of her via telephone has always been difficult, even my younger sister just waits til she calls her.

It may not happen at all, who knows, but it’s been my experience that if I avoid dealing with things, things just keep repeating themselves.

 

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6 thoughts on “Microblog Mondays – Some things just don’t go away

  1. This explains a lot. I don’t think I knew that you were the middle one of three sisters. Have I got that right? Anyway, that’s me too. Not quite so difficult, but I’m always careful with my eldest sister, as completely innocent comments can be taken the wrong way. I hope you can recover some of your relationship.

  2. I give you props for trying to figure out a way to resolve this. There’s no drama like family drama! *sigh* Sending you positive thoughts, and I hope things get better soon.

  3. It’s hard when it’s family since they’re supposed to be there for you (and you for them) through everything. So it’s probably worth attempting to smooth things over. But at the same time, perhaps also knowing that it’s not possible.

  4. (((HUGS))) Good luck!! Sibling relationships can be so complicated… I get along all right with my (younger, by 21 months) sister — in fact, probably better than we have in a while — but as I tell people, it’s definitely not a Hallmark (“my sister is my BEST FRIEND!!”….) kind of relationship. My mother has a prickly relationship with her younger brother, and my grandmother & her older sister would go for years on end without speaking to each other, even though they both lived all their lives in the same small town. Whenever my sister & I get ticked off at each other, we just remember Grandma & Great-Aunty E., and that’s kept us from crossing the line many times…! Anyway, she can’t hang up on you if you’re right in front of her, right? And if you need some distraction, we could always have lunch. 😉

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