Archive | November 2016

Let the good times roll

I landed 2 gigs!  And one of them is a recurring part (at least 2 episodes I think) and I get to play an African nun!  Yay!  So of course, I now have a f****ing cough again and I’m on set next week.  What is it with me and working on set with an uncontrollable cough?!!!  This is like the 3rd time this has happened to me.

The in laws are arriving tomorrow, it’s Boo’s birthday weekend and I’ve got to work on my accent. And my shoot days just happen to be on the days I booked notetaking work (that’s never happened before).  I called my client and explained I couldn’t work for her, but I’ve been unable to find a suitable replacement for her.  She was really happy for me, but I feel terrible about leaving her in the lurch.

I am so freaking grateful!  Eeks, I haven’t worked in so long, I’m nervous!!

Microblog Mondays – Contagion

It’s been quite the week, hasn’t it?  I was at a farewell party for some Buddhist friends of mine who are moving to Whitehorse, NWT.  I had to race back home, open a bottle of wine and watch the US election results.  Trump became the next president – WTF America?.  I’ve had to unfriend someone on my Facebook who kept leaving rabid anti-Hillary/conspiracy rants on my feed after I would repost certain articles.  I get it, not everybody has to agree with me, that’s fine, but I was beginning to feel reluctant to repost articles because I was afraid I was going to have to deal with the above mentioned vitriol from that person.  This person was also a fellow Buddhist though he wasn’t a personal friend.  Yep, surprise.   So bye bye, if you refuse to leave your muddy shoes at the door, you can’t come in my house.  I don’t need to be aggravated and engage in mudslinging over people I can’t even VOTE FOR.  Frankly, I rarely take a political stance on Facebook and I usually just repost certain videos that reflect my personal views.  I use it primarily just to keep in touch with acting colleagues and friends.  And watch funny animal videos – that’s crucial.  I would prefer to have serious social discourse in person as oppose to online, but you know, that’s how things are these days.

I’ve been at the hospital 3 times in a week visiting my acting teacher (transplanted American) who was beside herself after the election results. I’ve been reading how even here, children are being racially harassed at school and then yesterday I read this article in the neighbourhood newspaper. Not like this shit doesn’t exist here, but it all happened within 5 days after the election.  As if certain people felt like they have a certain social approval and impunity to unload their racist shit on people.

I also found out that the one last thing I need from the government in order to conclude my job as the administrator of my mum’s estate – despite them having my request for over 20 weeks, they have done NOTHING  on the file.  NOTHING.  After finally reaching a human being, she starts to tell me how understaffed they are and blah, blah, blah.  Bureaucracy.  Surely, if I owed the government anything, they come at you with hammer and tongs.  This  I know from experience and yet when they can’t do their job in a timely fashion, too bad for you.

Then this morning, I found out I didn’t get a position in a theatre workshop that would have been creatively invigorating (not to mention a steady income) after a dismal year in TV and film.

Things are getting a lot more stressful at home.  The dog needs expensive dental surgery, Boo’s birthday is coming up, Christmas season is upon us and my hair looks like shit.  (Feel my black woman blues.)  Seems disappointment and despair is in the air.  It’s contagious.  I’ve been chanting more these days in order to keep my spirits afloat.  I’m trying my best to encourage people when even in my heart, the tendrils of panic are stirring.  I’m in the midst of trying to make some major changes in my life, so I guess I shouldn’t be surprised.  I’m already feeling the need to blunt the edges with another glass of wine.  Looking for a soft place to land and people are leaning on me.  How do expand my heart, how do I expand my life?

There will be times in life when you cannot succeed. Or times when hardship seems about to crush you. Such times are inevitable, yet we should not allow our spirits to be broken by them. D. Ikeda

Up late and wired on sugar

Okay, it needs to stop raining.  Enough.  We’ve had about 26 rainy days out of 30.  Happily, it did not rain Hallowe’en night so fun was had by all.  Boo was dressed as a combination Batman, Optimum Prime and Captain America.  He was great in the haunted house, protected me with his shield.  He was lagging near the end a bit, so it’s no surprise he’s sick tonight.  I may have to keep him home tomorrow, but we’ll see how he’s doing. A friend of mine had her 22 year marriage implode and it’s just heartbreaking.  I think she’ll be fine but sadly she’s not the first woman I know that was caught off guard and I’m doing my best to support her without actually telling her what to do.  I’m trying like hell to be neutral because as soon as you bring that stuff home, well, everyone has an opinion, don’t they and you tend to take sides consciously or unconsciously.   And frankly, it’s scary cause it’s one of those couples where you didn’t expect it.  I mean, how you can profess your love for your wife 6 months ago and now it’s done?  Oh, yeah, you know where my mind went.  I remember that feeling when you discover that unconditional love you really believed you had wasn’t so unconditional, after all.

And guess who’s 15 year wedding anniversary is coming up next week?  Yup,and though I would love a romantic getaway being spoiled rotten, that’s not going to happen.  In fact, the idea of even going out for dinner is slipping away cause Boo is not feeling well which means once my tired husband comes home from moving his parents (who had not anticipated moving this soon and therefore his mother won’t be able to come over to babysit), there is no way he’s going to want to go out.  He wouldn’t trust a sitter and it wouldn’t be fun for either of us anyway.  So I’m preparing myself that it will be postponed.  I’m pretty sure he didn’t really plan anything special anyway.  The dog needs dental surgery and the estimate is sky high.  See?  This rain is making me negative.  Where’s my Vitamin D?

In the meantime, my mind is on Boo’s life book and it’s just about done, except for one photo of course and that photo was a gift and our printer is broken so I can’t scan it now.  Of course.  Working on Plan B.

While I was on my way to visit my acting teacher who is in hospital with a broken ankle for almost 3 weeks (it’s complicated), I get a call that my friend’s daughter is in hospital (long story) and in the end, I could only chant with her for 15 minutes before I left to pick up my son from school.

Okay, I gotta get to bed.  I ate too many Rocket candies (who brought them in the house???) and I’m on my period (my god, go away!!!) and I need to just let it all goooooo.