Some people have hot sex all night long.  Not our place, no way. That’s not what we do for excitement around here.   Instead Juno had a case of cold tail for which we gave her a vet approved pain medication.  And then just for giggles, while she’s out relaxing in the backyard, she gets skunked. Literally.  She got sprayed in the face by a skunk.  Not sure how that happened while she was in the fenced backyard, but we’re guessing, a skunk was making its way along the fence line and she caught wind of it and got all curious and decided to poke her head out of one of the many loose boards in the sad excuse called the fence to check it out.  The skunk taught her a lesson in minding her own business.  Did I tell you it was 10pm?

When I heard her come in and start shaking her head, DH went downstairs to check her out.  He thought she had got into something chemical.  I thought it was a skunk.  Upon moving closer to her, the smell was so noxious, I thought the same thing.  I wiped her head down with a towel, there was some foam on the top of her head and she was foaming at the mouth a bit.  I told DH to take her immediately to the ER  vet while I ran around the backyard with a flashlight looking for a noxious substance.  The only thing I found was a G.lade automatic spray device on the ledge in the basement.  We are actually super cautious about poisonous substances because we’ve had dogs and now we have a kid, so anything remotely poisonous is on a high shelf. I pulled the device apart and called DH to let him know that I had found the culprit.  Of course, my nasal passages were so overwhelmed with the noxious substance that I would have thought an apple pie was poisonous.  Anyway, he calls me later to  tell me that he and Juno had been shoeed out of the ER cause it’s skunk that’s the problem.  That explains the foaming at the mouth cause you’d be foaming at the mouth too if you got a snout full of skunk spray.  But she’s not dying, so we’re relieved.  So he goes off to the store to get hydrogen peroxide and I’m in the shower trying to brush my teeth and wash the stank that envelopes me and is progressively getting worse in the house.  I set out bowls of vinegar, scented candles, Miracle Spray  and Febreeze the f*** out of the place. I also have an essential oil diffuser going off in the basement.  In the end we decide on a mixture of vinegar, baking soda and dish detergent and he’s washing the dog at 11:30 at night.   Juno of course is a more than a little unnerved so of course, she wants to sleep upstairs with us.  Luckily, the kid is asleep and we don’t have to worry about him. The whole house stank all night long.  Good times.

So who needs hot sex anyway?

PS. It still stinks, including the car.

Reality check

Thanks for the breaking of leg wishes – I did okay at the audition – I think I could really benefit from some classes though.  Most actors go to regular classes every week to keep fine tuned and on their game and of course, I haven’t done that in about a year.  So I feel a bit rusty. Interesting, there was a man there who brought his little girl  (toddler age) with him.  Another actor(female)  watched her when he went in to audition.

I wanted to go shopping (for no particular reason other than to be alone ) after, but since dinner was going to be an issue, I ended up aimlessly cruising the grocery store and then picking up West Indian takeout for dinner.  Whenever I audition on the North Shore, I usually go to Starbucks or cruise the local grocery store just to distract myself from the self-criticism I put myself through after an audition.  And then I chanted in the car and gave myself a pep talk.  By the time I made my way through the traffic on the bridge, it was 2 hours later and hubby wants to know what took me so long. I’ll tell you what I was doing – enjoying being alone.  Until I held the wee man again and I went turned into mush when he smiled at me.

I told hubby he needs to have a father/son day. Like an 8 hour day.   I will gladly take JuJu and hang out with her (as long as it isn’t pouring).   I also wouldn’t mind attempting to get my tax preparations in order.  Eeks, did I just say that?  I’m thinking that I may have to leave the house in order to just start that.

I enjoyed an afternoon with Special K at a friend’s play reading.  I got us out early for our dog walk, got him bathed and fed and while he was napping got dressed up a bit.  Meaning out of my ever-present yoga pants.  I was ready for the 35 minute power walk up to the arts centre, but then he woke up wanting to be fed and there went that time.  We ended up driving there (endless stream of quarters in the metre) and then they started late.  Of course.  But it was WONDERFUL and I really enjoyed it.  Wee man cooperated by sleeping through an hour of it and respectfully took it all in when he was awake.  I couldn’t hang around to discuss it, but we caught up later on the phone.

I learned that if I am going to have a creative life, I’m going to have to have some form of child care because it’s next to impossible to concentrate on anything when your child wants and needs you.  Either that or you drink a lot of Red Bull and stay up all night.  More and more, I am growing amazed at my mum who had 3 daughters and actually WORKED OUTSIDE THE HOME and did ALL the housework ALL the time.  UNMEDICATED!!!

Mind you, she did have a couple of nervous breakdowns.

Need more wine

Good grief  – some days it takes me days to finish a post or read through and comment on blogs.  I think I did okay on ICLW, but by no means did I make Iron Commenter.  OMG, tough work!

I have two kids now, I realize and look at more poop that I care to admit.  Juno is fine – she’s eating and pooping like normal.  No hat came out, but I did find a LA dodgers hat on my walk.  Not a popular item in this town.

Hubby is going out of town on business in 2 weeks, so I’m trying to make appts before he goes away.  Got a mammogram next week, one day of work and Special K’s’ vaccinations all scheduled.  We’re also trying to visit people, or have people visit me and still have to get a new laptop for me and a rocking chair.

When hubby goes away, I’m going to get a dog walker or something, I just can’t walk the dog 2 hrs a day, deal with Special K, mum, etc on my own.  Screw it.  And now that we’re living on a cash budget, I’m not supposed to hire dog or housekeeping help, but you know what?  I am going to.  The child is not sleeping through the night yet and I am not superwoman. So there!

Furry baby

Yesterday started off promising – the sun was shining – and I thought oh, great, we’ll go for a nice walk in the trails today.  Right after I finished feeding the Precious, JuJu got all frantic, I had to ditch the kid to take her outside.  You guessed it, diarrhea!  Swell.  And then she pukes bile.   And of course, lots of people passing by.  I hate that but I just had to kick some dirt over it.  Can’t really pick it up, can I?  So back inside as quick as I can, the  baby is talking to himself in his bassinet.  I get ready for the day and put the kid in the Baby Bjorn and out we go.  Poor Juju went again and well, this time, there was a bit of blood.  Blood.  I tried not to freak out.  Called the hubby, called the vet who said blood in diarrhea wasn’t unusual and as long as the dog was acting normally, it could wait til the next day.  Hmmm.  I kept walking, trying to be calm.

10 minutes later, the dog goes again and this time blood is dripping from her behind.  RED BLOOD.  She’s not in any pain at all.  Be calm, I thought, she probably ate a stick or perhaps a bit of her bone scratched her insides or whatever. Don’t panic, she appears fine. Her usual sketchy self.    5 minutes later, she throws up clear spit.  I call the vet and this time I get an appointment for later that day.  If I could have teleported myself there, I would have.  She’ s still acting fine and normal so I keep going, but I’m freaked out and pretending not to be freaked out.  By the time we’re done, I realize that the baby’s hat is now missing.  ARGGH!  You know it had to be the really cute wool one with ears that was a gift and was probably one of those trendy booths from Granville Island.

So I go immediately BACK AROUND the loop again, chanting and swivelling my head around looking for the hat.  I did not find it.  So I got upset – I did not veer off the trail at all – who takes a baby hat?!  There were lots of people out, joggers everywhere because it was such a nice day.  If I had found a random baby item, I would simply pick it up and put it on a bench, hoping the owner would come back and get it, but I’m not sure I would have gone to the trouble to turn it into the parks board.

I obsessed about THAT cause I was really worried about the dog.  My last dog died of internal bleeding and you know I had THAT nightmare running in my head.  I checked her gums, all fine, I knew that as long as she was acting normally, she was just fine, but still….

Hubby came home early and with a list of symptoms and questions to ask, he took her to the vet.  He came home with some anti diarrhea pills.  She ate, she drank, she slept.  Hubby, having been told that there would be no homemade dinner that night, picked up my mum and Swiss Chalet and all was fine in my world.  Mum even sang that night.  I have no idea of what is going to happen when the Precious gets a fever.  Well, yes, I do – I’m going to be calm, cool and collected while I drive to the emergency department and god help hubby if he tries to tell me it’s NOTHING.

JuJu Fridays

sleeping mornings

Whose post is this anyways?

And now that I’ve unloaded some post adoption angst…..let’s get back to talking about my wonderful dog.  She’s had some issues of her own lately.  DH was all hellbent on trying to convince me that her paw chewing behaviour was due to all the attention on CB (chocolate button) but I kept telling him it was more likely her food.  She gets more walks than any other dog I know.  During the Christmas holidays, she was doing at least 5 k a day around the park.  A trip to the vet confirmed what my instincts were telling me all along…. her eye discharge, ear gunk, itchiness… was due to food allergies.  $83 later, DH and I had a new schedule for giving pills, eye drops and ear drops.  Had I not been wearing my halo I would have told DH I told you so at the top of my lungs.  But I was, darn it.

So back to the food that was working for her even though she crapped a lot.  Oh, she is a delicate flower, isn’t she? She’s doing well, walking beside the stroller while leashed around my waist.  At 68 lbs now, my back may give out if she finds a squirrel more interesting than me.

More Show and Tell moment with Mel at Stirrup Queens here.

Swirling thoughts

I was walking the dog in my usual cathedral, Ipod in my ears (that song Who Knew by Pink making me cry) and trying to sort through my anxiety.  As is my curse, I start by looking backwards.  A luxury of being middle class.  I still felt the sting of losing my friend to cancer and the loss of my dear Sampson.  I missed the laughter and wisdom of my girlfriend.  I want to talk to her.  I really wanted to have her antique rocking chair but could not bring myself to ask her miserable sister.  I wanted it selfishly because it the last chair she sat in, the one that went with her from place to place.  I wanted to feel her there when I rock a baby in my arms.  I have no idea where it went.  I’m still pissed that I didn’t get that memento of her to carry into my future.

I wondered where the time had gone – eaten up by that beast infertility.  I struggled, I rallied more than a few times.  Even enjoyed being childfree (I can hop on a plane just as soon as I get the dog kenneled).  I can walk as fast as I want and watch daytime TV.  I go for coffee and cake and speak uninterrupted on the phone.  Sometimes people ask me what I’ve been up to this year and I feel a bit ashamed.  I smile, mumble something.  No new film coming up.  I’ve been waiting.  You know, up until July I think I was actually adjusting to a childless life and then we were matched and  that bitch hope entered  my life again.  Up and down we went on the rollercoaster.  Will I win, will I lose, and at what cost?  Pun intended.  All my talk of creating and I’ve nothing to show for it.  Work wise I mean.  It’s difficult to feel fulfilled when the artistic side of you is not working.  Just typing.  All finances have been directed to two things.  Treating ourselves to relieve the anxiety of financing our adoption and well, the adoption.  All in the midst of a recession and job insecurity.

I can see why Virginia Woolf needed a room of her own.  How does a woman write, or accomplish something without having her concentration being continually broken with the demands of a dog that needs to be walked, food that has to be cooked, laundry that has to get cleaned, emails returned, floors swept, rugs vacuumed, husband’s phone calls and a demented mother to visit?  You notice I didn’t mention children, right? My life was set, I’d made disappointment my friend and grey hairs my new enemy. Now I’m actively trying to figure out what my life will look  like with an infant to get to know.  I missed the first 9 months, so we’ll be starting from scratch.  You know I’m not a morning person.  I gotta have at least 1/2 cup of coffee.  Mmm, need to learn how to use the automatic timer on the solo barista machine.  Yeah, I the motherly type, but let’s face it, I’ve been mothering a dog for the past 9 years.  And the only thing I’ve nursed is a hangover.

Oh, boy. I pop over to A&A’s blog to sneak a peek at a little black baby.  Check.  Still think they’re cute.  That’s good news.  Maternal feelings still there. Whew.

DH is back.  Well, sort of.  He was home for a bit, he walked the dog and then had to leave again for a business dinner.  Tomorrow is another late day, we have mum over and then it’s Wednesday, I’m working all evening so I should be home in time to watch hubby snore in front of the TV.  Sigh.  Well, at least with a kid, I’ll have a legitimate reason for not having sex.  Speaking of which the last time we TRIED to have sex, the dog practically pulled up a chair and stuck her rather long nose into our business.  We laughed so hard it ruined the moment.  I have to say she looked rather…. distraught.

Ah, at least we can still laugh together.  Note to self, keep plenty of bones in the freezer.  That way, we can ALL have a treat.

I got to learn not to take life so seriously.