Microblog Mondays – I’d rather be at work

There are quite a few things I should be doing right now and I have elected to do none of them.  I’m scheduled to work 6 days a week in the theatre but had a day off on the weekend as other scenes were being worked on.  It’s kind of a sweet deal for me, I’m in 4 short scenes and only with one other person who is the lead.  Of course that day off ended up being busier than if I had gone to the theatre.  Next week is hubby has work scheduled so I arranged an interview with a sitter , walked the dog with the family while working on my lines, did notetaking for a friend’s theatre company, cleaned the house (I always worry my house smells like dog to other people), then jetted off downtown to do notes, jetted back to meet sitter in my candle scented, vacuumed house, then took off for a play reading that my acting teacher was in.  Then last night I realize I could squeeze in another gig notetaking but the sitter is not available (hence now I need another backup sitter).

I have noticed that since gaining f/t (albeit temporary) employment that most of the household chores and appointment making still fall to me.   Hubby actually had the nerve to get short tempered  and griped to me about not doing more of his homework with our son.  Oh, yes, he did.   So I told him that he had better find a way to get some more sleep and not lose his temper so easily and I walked away, refusing to get engaged with the bullshit.  I had had a perfectly marvelous week and wasn’t about to let him get me down.    This after one week of being at home with our son (though the kid is in school) and not having work scheduled.  And not sleeping well. Frankly, he hasn’t slept well in several months.    I  dreamt that I left him and found a great new apartment.  Sigh. I honestly knew that my husband would not do well with self employment in an industry that constantly changes schedules and you have to work when you get it and you’re constantly waiting for cheques to arrive.  I get it.  I’ve done it most of my life.   You  don’t get a cheque every 2 weeks, it’s not 9-5pm, you don’t get two weeks off with pay and  you can’t piss people off or you end up losing contracts.  He hasn’t had a vacation in 3 years, he’s constantly stressed about money and for good reason, but honestly I get tired of his inability to deal with the stress.  Of course the next day he apologized to our son and spoiled him all day.  He makes dinner and is nice to me.  So I suppose that was an apology.

So this is what women who work outside of the home f/t go through.



8 thoughts on “Microblog Mondays – I’d rather be at work

  1. It’s such an annoying ingrained truth that the majority of domestic & household stuff ALWAYS falls on the woman, by sexist default, however decent the man might be. I talk about this with my mum friend: it’s a very real phenomenon. Despite both working full-time, it just lands on her all the time. I hope things pan out and your hub’s stress does abate a bit!

  2. I think what is always interesting to me is the stuff that doesn’t fall to one person or another because they’re the best at it (for instance, the better cook should do more of the cooking) but because of societal roles.

  3. Congratulations on the gig!! 🙂 I get that it’s a stressful change in the established routine, but it won’t be forever. Hang in there! (Both of you!! lol)

  4. Happy full time work! I’m sorry your husband is struggling with these role shifts. I agree with others that it is SO ANNOYING to have things just assumed to be yours, because of societal roles, and when something is done by a guy it is like “THROW ME A PARADE! I CLEANED A TOILET WITHOUT BEING NAGGED! I am AMAZING!” I have been annoyed lately at how much things fall to me, without children to help with homework, and it seems that laundering towels and sheets and vacuuming are perfectly doable by EITHER ONE OF US. Grrr. I’m about to make a chore chart again, or passive aggressively leave flyers for cleaning services on his desk… 🙂 Good luck ironing things out on all fronts, and enjoy the gig!

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