Yes, my callback went well but ….nothing. Crickets for the rest of the week. So onward and upward. That’s my lesson in attachment and being swayed by circumstances. I get at least one of those a year. At least I figured it out faster than usual. I prescribed myself some more daimoku and a measure of wine and made it through the week without hiding in bed. I have felt like quitting the acting business a thousand times before and I have done the dangerous business of comparing myself to others. Not a good thing to do to yourself. So I stopped doing at least that. I always appreciate being able to have another day to begin again.
I had a lovely respite by going out with my friend and watching some short films and then a great party. We drank wine and talked about our lady bits going awry and encouraged each other to really define what it is we want. We could not stay as late as wanted to however because we had an important Buddhist leader workshop at nine am the next morning so sadly we dragged ourselves away from the thumping house music and got to bed around 2am. She had dropped her daughter for a sleepover at our place and I had a sleepover at hers since it was closer to our culture centre. The workshop was inspiring, encouraging and invigorating!
Today was a PD day and I actually took Boo swimming much to his delight. I absolutely loathe going swimming well… because I can’t swim. But Boo can and so I ended up going. He just loves it so much. He just worked his sly charm on me and I couldn’t resist. So we played tag and Mr. Wolf in the children’s pool, I walked around mostly even though he insisted I take his goggles so I could swim. I convinced him to hang out in the hot tub with me eventually. Later, we hung out in the atrium and he actually sat in my lap and we talked and cuddled and tickled each other. I have the role that really counts.
A Woman My Age 
I’m so sorry you heard nothing after your callback going so well! I have to say, I admire your attitude and strength- I could never have a career where I was frequently at risk for rejection. With my job, they hired me 18 years ago, and have been stuck with me ever since! They can’t get rid of me without jumping through some serious hoops, and I have no intention of going anywhere. I’m just not strong enough to have it any other way.
My daughter loves to swim, too. She would go every day if I left it up to her. I always use the hottub as my leverage- I will take her swimming, but she has to spend the last 20 minutes in the hottub with me!
That IS the role that really counts. But I hear you on the other role. I am in a waiting game with work, and it is so hard to put yourself out there and then hear nothing. And then it feels like everyone responds at once, much later than predicted.
I am so sorry about the crickets after the callback, that stinks. I love your last sentence, though. It sounds like you had a lot of good things to balance out the craptastic no-news on the callback. I hope for better outcomes in the future, and lots more sleepovers and swimming.
So frustrating, but I’m glad you managed to find the silver lining. I agree – you are already starring in the greatest role of your life, and I’m sure your professional roles will… roll around soon. 🙂
My mother never learned to swim, but she made sure my sister & I learned. I’m no Michael Phelps, but I can stay afloat for awhile. 😉 You certainly have the role that counts 😉 but I hope the next part you want is yours too!